Turning the Tide: How to Ask for a MMF Threesome

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My friends are used to me asking them about sex. From discussions about a MMF threesome to talks about BDSM, I tell them that I’m always doing research. And it’s true. I am. But, I’m also highly interested in the topic, and in other people’s experiences. I would be, even if I wasn’t an erotic fiction writer. Because it’s so diverse and unique and intimate of a topic. It allows you the chance to really see someone.
The questions I ask for my research cover a variety of topics, and I never try to force an answer. And, when it comes to MMF threesomes, I’ve talked to lots of people. In this article, we’re investigating MMF threesomes and what exactly they are. Then, we’ll talk about ways that you can begin exploring them for yourself.

What is a MMF Threesome?

A MMF threesome is a type of group sex that involves two males and one female, and can look very different depending on the people involved. According to sex therapist Vanessa Marin, some of the most common positions for a MMF threesome include:

  • Mutual Masturbation

This is a wonderful position for breaking the ice and showing your partner(s) how you like to be touched.

  • The Doggy Blowjob

This position provides the opportunity for giving attention to your guest. It also allows the two guys to make eye contact and up the sexiness.

  • The Circle

Instead of mutual masturbation, The Circle grants an opportunity for mutual oral sex. All three parties lie on their sides in a circle and share the experience of giving and receiving.

  • The Double Stuff

Double penetration is one way to really enjoy the MMF threesome experience. The Double Stuff provides pleasure for everyone involved. It does, however, require lots of patience and lube, so it should only be practiced with lots of communication.

Exploring the MMF Threesome

Most people fantasize about taking part in some kind of threesome. Research shows that nearly 90% of all people have fantasized about having sex with multiple partners. But deciding on the participants to involve is where things can get tricky.
Some men say they want FFM.
One friend even told me that it was every man’s fantasy to watch two women together. When I asked why, he said it was because they hoped that the women would stop mid-play and said, “Come and join us.”
“It would make me macho,” one man said. “I was able to get two women into bed at the same time. I’m a stud.”
“But, don’t you consider the woman?” I always ask.
“Sure, she’s having fun, or else she wouldn’t do it.”
This might be true. But, I know of a few ladies who want to be with two men at once, for many different reasons. Some also have an interest for the reason that the men discussed. They want to see the guys together, and have them stop mid-play and say, “Come and join us.”
So why is it the men get the fantasy and the ladies do not?
It’s not always a simple answer.

What’s Good for the Goose

If you do an Internet search on MMF threesomes and ways to get a man to take part, you won’t find many hits. The reasons I listed above are some of the most heard ones, but it’s not the only thing my male friends said.
There is also the whole size thing.
No matter how many times you tell a man it’s not the size that matters, most of them still believe it is.
“What if he’s bigger than I am?” one friend asked. “I don’t want my girlfriend to be thinking about him when she and I are together again.”
Then there’s the whole thing of asking a friend to bed, and it being weird afterward.”
“But you’re okay with asking your girlfriend to be with another woman?”
“Well yeah, ’cause it’s fun.”
“How do you know the other’s not fun unless you try?”
We’ve all heard that at some point in our lives.
You don’t know if you’re going to like it unless you try it.
Although, it was usually about peas on your plate when you were a child.
However, when I posed that question to my guy friends, they immediately shut down. There was nothing they could say.

So, I’ve Done Some Thinking…

If you and your boyfriend have discussed a MMF threesome and you’ve been shut down, there are a few things you can try. The most important is to not get defensive or argumentative. All that’ll do is fuel the fire and raise unnecessary emotions.
Start by leaving it alone for awhile.
Then, when you feel comfortable and confident again, come back to the conversation. And, when you do, make sure you’re prepared for the conversation.
1. State Your Reasons
Just as he might have an interest in being with two women at the same time, you have your own fantasies. You want him to know this. Help him understand what it feels like to have an attraction to two men at once. Plus, tell him that there are some things that you need more than one man for (ie: The Double Stuff), and a sex toy is not what you had in mind.
2. Help Him Feel Secure
Remind your guy one more time that it’s not the size that matters. You’re not a package-comparison catalog, and size isn’t the only thing that determines a relationship. You’re with him; not some guy you both hook up with.
3. Set Your Boundaries
Things don’t have to move at hyperspeed, just because he’s agreed to a MMF threesome. This conversation, and future ones, set opportunities for conversations on fantasies and limits. Remind him that, like other sexual experiences, you can start slow and work your way up.
Trust and honesty must act as the foundation for your conversations surrounding MMF threesomes. Know where you both stand at all times of the encounter, and keep your relationship a priority. Remember, you’re having fun, not inviting someone into your lives forever.
It’s also important to be selective in the choices that you make. Find a trusted friend or take things slow with a new one. Make sure to discuss your expectations in depth. Having a conversation about an MMF threesome might feel awkward at first, but it’s important. Not only that, but as things carry on, you might find yourself aroused by the discussion.
An MMF threesome is definitely something worth experiencing. It can lead to discoveries about yourself, and your partner, to take your sexuality to a whole new level. And, asking for one doesn’t have to be scary. Approach it with tact, and you never know what kind of fun you might have.

Photo credit: Suwinai Sukanant, 123rf.com


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Melinda Barron on Blogger
Melinda Barron

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