New relationship energy or NRE is the feelings of intense giddiness, excitement, perfection, and bliss that come along with falling in love. It’s the feeling of butterflies in your stomach when you are attracted to a new person, and the desire to spend as much time with them as possible.
NRE sounds like utopia, right? What happens when these positive feelings cause harm? While everyone experiences NRE when embarking on a new relationship, it can pose challenges for people living a polyamorous lifestyle.
Have you found a new lovebird? While you may be experiencing positive new relationship energy, your current partner or partners may feel left behind. Your heightened feelings of emotional connection and sexual excitement may skew your normal state of mind. That being said, there’s no stopping your partner(s) from seeking their own new relationship. If you feel like your partner is making odd or erratic decisions, it could be caused by their NRE.
You have to be careful not to neglect your primary partner(s) when discovering a new relationship. The feelings of excitement will wear off once you’ve spent enough time with your new lover. Keeping your main partner satisfied is crucial to maintaining your relationship with them. NRE feelings will fade, and a balance in your previous relationship(s) must remain to avoid any broken hearts.
For some, new relationship energy is like a drug. They crave those feelings of new and exciting sexual opportunities that make falling in love addictive. While excitement is healthy, beware of NRE junkies. These are the people you hear about in the poly community who tend to discard old lovers in favor of new ones. NRE junkies may try to use polyamory as an excuse to lie, cheat, or gaslight you — none of which applies to the poly lifestyle. That’s just unethical non-monogamy. It’s normal to go a little off the rails when getting invovled with someone new, but an ethical partner will always do their best to make sure that your needs are met first and that you still feel valued. They’ll never cross boundaries or intentionally hurt you.
No one is saying you shouldn’t explore new relationships. NRE is extremely common and healthy in poly relationships. The ability to experience new feelings of love and excitement with multiple people is one of the biggest perks of living a poly lifestyle. That said, it can be dangerous to let things go too far. To prevent NRE from impairing your decision-making skills, remember that the feelings are temporary. Enjoy them while they last, because before you know it, they will wear off. Continue to nurture those who already love you, and have fun!
The post New Relationship Energy in a Polyamorous Relationship appeared first on Non-Monogamy Blog by SwingTowns.