Is the Polyamorous Lifestyle the Secret to Happiness?

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Living the lifestyle of polyamory comes with many benefits. These include increased personal growth as well as a better understanding of yourself. But, could it actually be the secret to happiness? It might be!

Is Polyamory the Key to a Happy Marriage?

Most people may think of a “happy marriage” as some sort of partnership where the couple never does anything without the other. They feel the need to fulfill the “I can’t live without you” fantasy. Consequently, when things don’t work out this way (because, life), many couples begin to overanalyze all they think is wrong in their relationship. 

  • Why doesn’t (s)he enjoy doing things with me?
  • Why can’t (s)he do [xxx] to make me happier?

The thought patterns grow and continue. Eventually, many also reach the ultimate “our relationship is tanking” question: “Why doesn’t my partner make me happy anymore?

four friends interested in polyamory dancing at sunset

Is Your Happiness Dependent on Another Person?

Recently, a friend of mine made a very heartfelt announcement on social media. She explained that she and her husband were divorcing. Although she “loves him dearly”, she says, she “hasn’t been happy for a long time…”

I wanted to comment back to her, “It isn’t his job to make you happy.”
And, it’s that knowledge that sets polyamorous people apart. They already know.

People who practice polyamory tend to have more developed relationship skills. This is especially true when compared with those who have only been monogamous. Polyamorous adults are also more understanding of themselves and their desires. Not only that, but they are better at communicating them. 

Put simply, people who practice polyamory tend to not only be happier but also healthier.

polyamorous couples laughing and talking at sunset

Polyamorous relationships are different. Unlike many traditional marriages, couples ground them in non-possessiveness. Partners don’t own one another and aren’t limited by their relationships. If one partner is out with someone else, the other one is also free to enjoy pleasures of all times. This could include:

  • dating
  • taking a class
  • learning a new skill
  • starting a new hobby
  • pursuing an aspiration
  • … as well as all the things that people have to leave their monogamous relationships to do!

Is polyamory the true answer to happiness?
It really could be!

Final Thoughts

If you’re considering divorce because you aren’t happy, then stop.
In fact, I’m going to let you in on a little secret: you are responsible for your own happiness. If losing weight, traveling, and letting go of limits in your relationship is what you need – do it! Talk about it with your spouse. Don’t just throw your relationship away without trying to communicate. 

Be honest.
Be open.
Let go of the possessiveness that monogamy has created in your relationship. Allow yourselves to grow in so many new ways.


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