I Had to End My First Swinger Experience After I Heard My Wife Moaning Under Another Guy

How to Politely Move On at a Swingers Club | Advice for the First Time Swinger
December 13, 2019
Rejected at a Swinger Party | Advice for the First Time Swinger
January 7, 2020

This true story was submitted anonymously.

My wife and I have always been best friends. We never keep anything from each other, we laugh more together than with anyone else, and I knew from the day I met her that I would spend the rest of my life with her and only her.

Then we learned about swinging.

For 10 years, the only people we ever had sex with was each other. While that’s always been enough, we’ve both had fantasies about sharing each other.

Our relationship has always been really solid, so when my wife suggested that we try it, I was on board right away.

We got on SwingTowns and went to our first swinger event.

They Were More Experienced Than Us

The first couple we met that we liked had been in the lifestyle for five years.

When we told them we were newbies they were so welcoming and open about being interested in us. They assured us they would help us go at our own pace. They seemed like the perfect couple for our first experience.

I remember the last conversation my wife and I had before we took the plunge. We didn’t talk about trust, fears, anything like that. We were so confident in each other, we were sure there wouldn’t be any problems.

After texting back and forth for a few weeks, we decided to set up a date.

The Hotel Room Wasn’t Great

I was disappointed to find that the other couple had booked a room with two queen size beds instead of one king. I’d always pictured my wife and I being close during our first experience, but here we were at least three feet apart.

“It will be fine,” I thought, watching my wife get into bed with the other guy. I laid down in the one opposite with his wife and the games began.

At first, we just fooled around. I loved seeing my wife’s body move with another man, the pleasure on her face as he grabbed her hair, played with her breasts…

Things got more serious. Then I heard her moan.

I Instantly Went Soft

For 10 years, I’d heard those noises. For 10 years, I was the only one who brought them out of her. They were so familiar to me.

Hearing it from across the room was a shock to my system. It was like I was having an out-of-body experience.

“Are you okay?” My “bed partner” looked compassionate, like she knew what was happening.

“Um…”

There it was again. My wife moaning under another man.

“I’m sorry,” I said. I got out of the bed. My wife and her partner stopped.

We agreed to end the evening, the other couple being incredibly supportive and understanding.

I Learned this is a Common Experience

I had so many questions and insecurities after that first experience. So much about it turned me on, and I enjoyed everything about it until the very end.

Was this a normal first reaction or was I not cut out for this lifestyle?

We stayed in contact with that couple after our night together. Everyone, especially my wife, continued to be supportive and understanding.

The other couple admitted this wasn’t their first time someone “chickened out” with them (my words, not theirs). They told us that it does help to be close to your partner in your first few encounters, and they advised us to go even slower than we thought we were ready to.

Now, two years later, we’ve found our rhythym. We’ve learned that, no matter how solid a relationship might be, swinging is still an exercise in trust. It will test you and poke at insecurities/fears you may not have even realized were there.

With enough practice, exposure, and LOTS of communication, those insecurities and fears do fade.

So if you’re anything like me, and find yourself unable to complete a swinger meetup or are experiencing jealousy you didn’t know was there, please learn from my mistake. Take it slow, stay close to your S.O., and talk through every insecurity or fear you might have.

Are you a first time swinger? Check out our swinger club FAQ for beginners.

The post I Had to End My First Swinger Experience After I Heard My Wife Moaning Under Another Guy appeared first on Non-Monogamy Blog by SwingTowns.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *