It’s no secret that because of dating apps like SwingTowns, and the ease of connection these platforms provide, finding casual hook-ups is better than ever. Nowadays, getting the ~action~ you crave, be it from one partner or dozens, is as simple as tapping a few keys. You can date, hook up, look for long-term friends-with-benefits…the sky’s the limit! Thanks to these dating apps, choosing a partner can be as simple or as complicated as you want.
Of course, if you’re specifically on dating sites for hookups, there are some things you should know before diving in. A perfect hookup is not usually something that just happens, especially if you have no experience. Luckily, we have plenty of tips that will come in handy. Let’s take a look at some of them.
10 Hookup Tips For Serial Online Daters
1. Don’t send pics without consent
This is one of the most important rules for online dating, regardless of whether you’re looking to hook up or not. Unfortunately, it is also one of the most ignored. Here’s the deal: consent isn’t JUST about what hapens in the bedroom. Always ask before sending nudes or ludes, and expect the same from your partner. Respect is #1 when it comes to any sort of relationship, even one that is just about hooking up.
2. Be clear about your intentions
Making your intentions clear to your partner is very important to have the perfect hook-up. On dating apps, even those geared toward those looking for hook-ups, you can’t assume everyone wants the same thing. To have a great hook up (and avoid awkwardness), make sure that you and anyone you get involved with are on the same page. Even if you wind up in bed with someone, if they are expecting more later on, things can get complicated fast. Communication is key.
3. Go into it with an open mind
It can be easy to fantasize about how a hook up will go, but it will almost never be the dream you have in your head. There will be awkward moments. You might bore your date to death or vice versa. Maybe your date edited their selfies a little too much… Try to make the most of it! If you don’t go into it with narrow expectations, you won’t be so disappointed when the night ends. Yes, some hook ups won’t be perfect (they might even be terrible) but if you’re not too attached to the outcome, you can recover faster and move on to the next adventure!
4. Eye contact
We get it: hook ups are intimidating, especially if you aren’t very experienced. We’re not saying you should stare your partner down the whole night (that’s weird), but don’t be afraid to look them in the eye when you’re talking to them and definitely make sure to do it from time to time when you’re *ahem* getting down to business. The more nervous you appear, the more insecure the other person might feel as they wonder if maybe you’re not into them. Confident eye contact will assure them that you are into them, it will make you feel more connected, and it’s just really hot. Whenever you’re on a date, whether you’re hooking up with someone or not, practice good eye contact!
5. Don’t be afraid to take the lead
At times, the tension of initiating things can be the worst part of a hookup. Waiting for someone to make the first move can be infuriating at best, and awkward at worst. If you are looking to have the perfect hook up, don’t be afraid to take things into your own hands and make the first move, provided there is consent on both ends. How do you know if you have consent? Ask! Tell them how badly you want to kiss them, and if they reciprocate, you have the go-ahead to lean it. Your partner will be turned-on by your confidence, and likely grateful that you were the one to take the plunge.
6. Remember to use protection
This should go without saying, but we’re going to say it anyway because it’s important: Whenever you are hooking up with people, especially casually, always make sure to use protection. Use condoms even when your partner is on birth control pills (you never know what can go wrong). It is best to avoid risks and be safe rather than sorry.
7. Don’t assume that you know what your date likes
Everyone has different preferences when it comes to sex, so for a truly perfect hook up, it’s important to ask your partner what they want–and need–in the bedroom. It’s not all about you or vice versa. If they seem shy about telling you, don’t be afraid to have some suggestions ready. Just make sure you have consent (refer to #1) before doing anything too wild. If you can find the middle ground of what you both enjoy, you’re sure to have a great sexual experience.
8. Try not to involve alcohol
Getting consent becomes 1000x more complicated when drinking is involved, especially in a hook up scenario. It’s honestly best to just not do it. If, however, alcohol does become involved, and either one of you becomes intoxicated, wait for the drinks to wear off before attempting to ask for consent (otherwise, it doesn’t count — PERIOD).
9. Keep some lube handy
Not all women operate the same ~downstairs~ so it’s a really good idea to have some lube around just in case foreplay doesn’t get your partner sufficiently wet. Having a great hook up means anticipating any needs your partner might have. They will endlessly appreciate how you take their pleasure seriously, and the more relaxed they are (and you are), the better the experience will be as a whole.
10. Foreplay, foreplay, foreplay
There are so many sensitive spots on the human body, and the more you play with these areas (for example, by gently stroking or kissing them), the hotter and more intimate things will become. Many people like at least 15 minutes of foreplay before getting down to business. Ask your partner what they like, and give it to them! Just be prepared for things to get very wet, very fast.
Photo credit: Dmitrii Shironosov, 123rf.com